Naming the NBA’s Beards
Given that the Oklahoma City Thunder are in the NBA Finals, and that James Harden is my favorite player (despite his recent less-than-luster offensive production), I decided to do a post on NBA facial Hair.
Now, there are quite a few blog posts that detail the NBA beards but this one aims to name them.
In order of Freshest to Dankest:
James Harden – “The BeardFather”
Vince Carter – “Manscaper”
Chris Andersen – “The Inmate”
OJ Mayo – “Quarterpounder with Cheese”
Ronny Turiaf – “The Cracken”
Baron Davis – “The Trendsetter”
Kevin Love – “King of The North”
Kevin Durant – “Approved by Mom”
LeBron James – “M.P.B.”
Drew Gooden – “The Old Testament”
Markieff Morris – “Rookie Effort”
Ricky Rubio – “The Tickler”
Luis Scola – “The Argentine Afterthought”
Robin Lopez – “The False Hope”
Chris Kaman – “Viking’s Warmth”
Kendrick Perkins – “The Child Eater”
Udonis Haslem – “Glued Pubes”
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M.P.B. = Male Pattern Baldness
Glued pubes could not fit that awful excuse of a beard any better
Neb, much love. I was watching game 3 when it hit me and I haven’t called him anything since.
Glued Pubes should 100% be Paul Pierce.
Two Game of Thrones references is too many for the nba
I only read one Game of Thrones reference Burt…